International Association for the Study of Dreams

[timeisnotlinear]

Last night I had a dream about a young woman. In the dream we had a romantic time together, hung out and had a really good time. I woke up several times and when I fell back asleep worked very hard to return to the dream, which I did. At one point when she left the room I was in, I went through her purse to get a name. I found a license which only gave me the name (removed). Then in the dream I reviewed facebook for and saw a nickname she used as a screen name, only that one was kind of odd and I wasn't able to remember all the letters. I reviewed the information this morning when I finally got in front of a computer, but alas it has all been a dead end.

Now here is what I mean by a dream changing your reality. I am a single male that loves being single. In fact, most of my life I have been single, I rarely date. I prefer the safety of solitude. However, after having a dream like that one where I had such a wonderful connection in a relationship and enjoyed it so much, no I find myself wanting a relationship.

So instead of waking life (unless this was subconscious which is entirely possible) influencing the dream world, this one seems to be going the opposite way. This does happen, in fact a lot I suppose, but never before have I seen it so glaringly.

*Edited a word that was incorrect. Removed name.

[Away]

That is really neat...but now if you meet her she is going to know you went through her purse.

But really though, I have met, or seen, many other people in dreaming before I meet them physically. Most often it is having to do with some sort of situation that is going to happen with them.

But I have only met one other in dreaming who I could feel inside, which is tsunaH, and we meet in many ways, since we were small even.

Maybe you will meet her.

I have a suggestion, that of course you can take or leave...and that is, to not tell anyone, no one at all, what she looks like, smells like, how her energy feels, or anything.
That should weed out for you anyone who reads your post and possibly tries to pose as her to you. Not always on purpose, sometimes someone could just be reacting to the energy...but there are those who do things like that on purpose.

That is good that you can go back into the dream too. That takes some focus.

[timeisnotlinear]

That's good advice on not mentioning her characteristics; I removed the name as well. You never know who out there will use what information for what purpose.

I too have met other people in dreams before I have met them in waking life and I'm always fascinated when it happens. I wonder how often it occurs though since I rarely remember a dream for that long (if it takes years to occur) unless there is something very very special about it or it has a definite precognitive feel.

As for going back into the same dream, I often am not able to do that. I think I just really wanted to this time.

As for meeting her eventually, it’s possible. If Dunne is correct and dreams contain 1/3 past, 1/3 present and 1/3 future, there was one character from my past and one from my present already represented.

[waveluv]

I would say that dreams, mindfully examined, always change reality, if this is to mean affecting waking life. for instance: i had a dream of finding a stray dog who looked like my dog, Tanner; a male Jack Russel. I(we) decided to adopt it, and took it home. the stray shape shifted into a young man. The dream concluded with me sending him away with the excuse that I cannot support another person in our family. contemplating this dream lead me to conclude that I had doubts about my daughters fiance; accepting him into my life and family( He has been opaque about what he does for a living, but he makes my daughter happy). It has caused me to contemplate this relationship during my waking life. Having said this, I dont know what action I would take resutling from this reflection.
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SZZZZZZZZZ!

[Marcia]

Many people would say that the purpose of a dream is to teach you something about yourself.

When the dream influences your reality, it means that this time you have been paying attention to what the dream is trying to teach you.

[timeisnotlinear]

Yeah, except I'm back to preferring being single. So it didn't stick.

[waveluv]

I have several comments:
the first concerns habits: I think you have, at least, reinforced habits. but this could cut both ways; you practice being in a relationship both vertually and actually. This may lead to more attempts, because there was something hopeful about it. But it may reinforce avoidant behavior because the experience caused some suffering.
The 2nd has to do with the phases of habit changing: a recent book on memory, described phases of learning new habits... so the 1st phase has to do with contemplating a change. There is no action but a plan may be taking shape. the 2nd has to do with deciding, you start the active phase( you can tell when a person is in this stage because they generally use language that describes goal directed behavior). the 3rd the is plateau phase. One only goes to what is required, either to other peoples standards, or your own "this is good enough". But a person may decide to get better at the habit and enter a new ACTION phase to build upon the habit.
Shifting back n forth in these phases is normal.
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SZZZZZZZZZ!

[waveluv]

You will seek more dreams like this.
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SZZZZZZZZZ!